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Jo Brand Quotes

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'Anything is good if it's made of chocolate.'

'People say you should read your criticism because it will make you a better person but it doesn't. It just makes you a sad bitter old showbiz nightmare'

'With two small children, I haven't had a wash since 2001 so the chance to go shopping is way down the list. It is something I do intend to get'

'Bexhill on Sea is a peck on the cheek: Hastings is a lolloping tongue down the throat'

'Bexhill on Sea is a peck on the cheek whilst Hastings is a lolloping tongue down the throat'

'My favorite sexual fantasy is smearing my body in chocolate and being left alone in a room to eat it'

'When I was a nurse my favourite assignment was the anorexia ward. I sometimes had 17 dinners'

'A woman that does a mans work is just a lazy cow'

'The way to tell if a man is sexually excited is to check if he is breathing'

'Andrew Marr looks like Martin Clunes with a little of the air let out of him'

Born in Wandsworth, London
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Brit Quote:
Thieves respect property - they merely wish it to become their property - GK Chesterton
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On this day:
Edward II killed at Berkeley Castle - 1327, Battle of Prestonpans - 1745, Tolkien Publishes The Hobbit - 1937, First Old Grey Whistle Test - 1971
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