Spike Milligan Quotes
'A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.'
'All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy.'
'Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?'
'Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.'
'How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.'
'I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.'
'I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe's singing until somebody told me that it wasn't a joke.'
'I thought I'd begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.'
'I'm a hero with coward's legs.'
'I'm not afraid of dying I just don't want to be there when it happens.'
'Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it's all in perfect working order.'
'Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.'
'My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic.'
'A man loses his Dog so he puts an ad in the local paper - Here Boy!'
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